


You Will Always Find Me In Your Heart

by bigmenwinthese



Series: Big D's Oneshots/Drabbles [3]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on the recent streams, Depressed TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Everyone Needs A Hug, Exiled TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt Toby Smith | Tubbo, Hurt TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), I Made Myself Cry, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Mentioned Alexis | Quackity, Mentioned Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Floris | Fundy, Mentioned Niki | Nihachu, Mentioned Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Wilbur Soot, President Toby Smith | Tubbo, The Author Regrets Everything, Toby Smith | Tubbo Angst, Toby Smith | Tubbo Misses TommyInnit, TommyInnit Angst (Video Blogging RPF), TommyInnit Misses Toby Smith | Tubbo, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, im crying please i just want them to be happy, like srsly please they all have been through so much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:07:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28431402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bigmenwinthese/pseuds/bigmenwinthese
Summary: Tubbo grieves over the fact that he lost and gave up his best friend to the nation.Tommy learns to accept the bitter truth that not everyone can be there for him.『••✎••』AKA, Author D cries over block men roleplay and aggressively writes an angst songfic
Relationships: Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit
Series: Big D's Oneshots/Drabbles [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2064939
Comments: 7
Kudos: 97





	You Will Always Find Me In Your Heart

**Author's Note:**

> !!REMINDER THIS IS ALL ROLEPLAY!!
> 
> hehe angst block men go brrr  
> i promise im working on the other stuff i just wanna write this because i got inspired
> 
> also yes the song is from the smurfs okay sush

❝ _I knew that I was different_

_Didn't think you'd understand_

_Nothing happens like you plan it anyway_

_Searching for a reason_

_Guess I never really knew_

_Where I belong_ ❞

══════════════════

Tommy felt all sorts of emotions when he saw Tubbo standing there, finally seeing him after weeks. He felt a burning hatred for the other, but at the same time, he also wanted to cry and hug him tight, never letting go. Feelings aren’t exactly his strong suit.

So when he turned his back on him after the hostage incident, he barely glanced back. The seventeen year old president seems to be on the verge of breaking down at any moment, and Tommy had to push down the urge to comfort him.

He had every right to be mad at his fr- _former_ best friend, right? Yeah, that’s right. He’s mad ‘cause he exiled him and left him ~~He was being a good president~~ , and now he was talking about bullshit ~~It’s my fault~~. The blonde couldn't help but feel a little bit of pride inside as he finally released all of his pent-up anger on Tubbo. ~~Why did it still hurt so much when he saw the pained look in his eyes?~~

Brushing those thoughts aside for now, he decided to distract himself by taking a walk. The teen slowly stood up from his makeshift bed, and climbed out of the cottage he's living under in, taking a trip into the spruce forest.

  
L'Manburg was nicer when he was gone, he noticed. It definitely captured the winter's spirit. Even the anarchist pig who never really seem to care about anything took note of that. Sometimes he wondered if he really was a liability ~~he is~~ and if he was holding everyone back. Either way, it seemed like everyone seems to be having fun without him ~~would it be better if he was dead~~. 

Tommy vigorously shook his head. No, he can't think like that. Everything that Dream- _that_ green lying bastard -said to him during the hellish weeks of his exile, was complete and utter bullshit. He cringes at the thought he even believed him and trusted him of all people. 

_His bright blue orbs was glaring at the other man with pure anger and hatred in his eyes. "Dream," he spat, complete venom in his tone of voice, and spite upon saying his enemy's name._

_The grip on his sword tightened, as he moved to scrape the blade against the netherite chestplate, his eyes not leaving the white porcelain mask. "Go fuck yourself."_

He grinned, reminiscing back to that memory. It still gave him a little glee of pride even if it happened yesterday. _Damn, he's so fucking awesome._

══════════════════

❝ _I can see things clearly_

_But it's time to say goodbye_

_And then leaves me asking why_

_It took so long_

_I was always trying_

_To find that special thing inside_

_That made me strong_ ❞

══════════════════

The blonde figured he should be getting back by now, not wanting to worry his older brother, and the night would spawn unwanted mobs in the area. He noticed how his pocket felt heavier, so he pulled out the circular object. 

_"His favorite thing in the whole wide wolrd...is Tubbo!" The ghost smiled happily as he finally showed what he had in his cold hands. It was a compass, the words 'Your Tubbo' engraved on the frame, as the pointer in the middle moved from time to time. Tommy couldn't help but stare at it in awe, memories flashbacked through his mind._

_His older brother then took his silence to continue. "Tommy, I know you really really like Tubbo and..I know you really really miss him. So I went out of my way and made you this. It costed me a lot of stuff, but that doesn't matter." He exclaimed, placing the compass in his hand. "It basically points you to Tubbo at all times so no matter where you are in this bitch of an earth, you'll know where he is."_

_He felt the corner of his lips slightly tug upwards, as he held the compass close to his chest. "Thank you..." He said softly. After Ghostbur had left, Tommy placed the compass in his ender chest, specifically placed right next to his discs, his prized possessions._

Tommy turned back to reality, and only then was he able to register the tears falling down his cheeks. He let out a quiet sniffle, proceeding to wipe them away to hide it from no one whatsoever. He thought back to the good old days, where he and Tubbo would run around and play pretend, laughing like there's no tomorrow. They made a silent promise to stick by each other no matter what. It was ~~supposed to be~~ them against the world. 

...No. It's about time he accepted the truth. His best friend had a nation to rule over. And him? He has his own thing to deal with. 

But maybe, just maybe, he could get a look at the bench for one last time, before fully disregarding his memories. 

══════════════════

❝ _Love is all I need_

_It's where it all began_

_You will always find me in your heart_

_I know that you can see_

_Just who I really am_

_So always know_

_I'm never far away_

_Keep me close another day_

_But you will always find me in your heart_ ❞

══════════════════

Tubbo wondered where he went wrong.

Everything had started going downhill when he became president ~~when he exiled Tommy~~ , he mused. L'Manburg wasn't the same anymore after Wilbur blew up the whole nation. Sure, it had been rebuilt and renovated into something better, but it's just a building. A place where people lived in. 

It lost it's meaning altogether when they all started separating from each other.

Fundy and Niki left to pursue a peaceful life outside of this hellhole (although, Fundy is still part of the cabinet so he's present during the meetings), Quackity started his own nation, El Rapids, and is currently trying to train harder in order to beat Dream and Technoblade (Sometimes Tubbo feels like Quackity has the higher rank than he does, because he seems to be the one making the decisions).

And now ~~his best friend~~ Tommy, who is alive and well, now teaming up with Technoblade to get his discs back. That type of duo never seems to end well.

_"You exiled me and never came and visited once!" Tommy yelled, jabbing a finger at him with anger in his eyes._

_"I did! I came and visited twice!" Tubbo responded, his voice getting louder as they yelled at each other and argued, before Technoblade and Ranboo eventually pulled them away from each other. ~~He just couldn't face him so he was making excuses~~_

The president felt so lost and hopeless. Everything jut felt so...empty.

He then closed his eyes, trying to clear his mind from all those negative thoughts. For now, he just wants to be himself, and not just a seventeen year old president who the whole country depends on.

══════════════════

❝ _Looking for some answers_

_And questioning what's real_

_I was facing what I feel and what I knew_

_Never quite believing_

_I had the power to define what makes things true_ ❞

══════════════════

_So, I know you've been sad and you're having a hard time with yourself." Ghostbur exclaimed, making the younger frown a little due to how accurate he was being. He hasn't been feeling well since that day. "I know you think you've done something wrong, but it's okay! Tommy will enjoy his vacation. It's just the fact that it's new to him."_

_"Yeah...it's just an adjustment." Tubbo replied, nodding in agreement. ~~He only likes to think that way because he doesn't wanna face the fact that he betrayed him~~_

_The ghost hummed in acknowledgement. "The best part of the vacation is coming home so the longer he stays in Logstedshire, the better will it be when he comes home. And I'll make sure nothing bad will happen to him, and I'll make sure to keep him happy."_

_He softly smiled at the reassurance. "Thank you, Ghostbur." Even in death, Wilbur seems to be the one taking care of Tommy._

_"Tubbo," the former president continued. "I know...you and him- you know, you're together and you've always got each other. So I made you this." He suddenly handed him a compass, with the words 'Your Tommy' engraved on the side. Tubbo almost felt like crying then and there._

_"It costed me some stuff but that's okay! No matter the distance, you would always know where Tommy is so that you can still find each other."_

_"T- thank you...it's really- that's so touching." Tubbo let out a small laugh, as he gripped the circular object in his hand. He made a silent vow to himself to never ever et the compass out of his sight._

Speaking of compasses, he stared at the object in his hand, the pointer moving subtly towards some sort of direction. It didn't mater now whether Tommy is alive or not because he clearly is, but what shocked him is the direction he was moving towards to.

Tubbo hesitated for a moment, before getting up from his desk and following the compass, wanting to see his best friend. The paperwork can wait another time.

Right now, he wanted to see his best friend again.

══════════════════

❝ _So when I'm feeling different_

_When like no one really cares_

_A little lonely, a little scared, or even blue_

_I just think of how you loved me_

_And I realize my heart belongs to you too_ ❞

══════════════════

Tommy checked the time. He still have two minutes until the invis potion wears off. 

Well, it's not like he'll be here for long anyway, and everyone seems to be busy doing something somewhere else besides L'Manburg. 

He carefully walked down the path to his embassy (which is now "claimed" by someone else) and stared at the bench. His hand hovered over the jukebox sitting next to it, feeling warmth and comfort from remembering all those times. He missed them, he missed L'Manburg, and he especially missed Tubbo. Do they feel the same about him? Hopefully so ~~He doubts that they missed him too.~~

Sitting down on the bench, Tommy stared at the sun slowly setting in the sky, illuminating bright shades of orange and red. He stared back at the compass in his hand, the pointer moving in an entirely different direction. 

Huh, where is he going at this time of-

"Tommy..?"

-day. The blonde slightly flinched upon someone calling out his name, and he realized the potion had already wore off. Tubbo was there, standing still, his compass also in hand. 

Neither of them said a word, as the president moved closer towards the wooden bench to reclaim his seat. They stayed like this for a while, neither of them making eye contact with the other, which only made the atmosphere more tense.

That was when, Tommy finally decided to speak up, not being able to take the awkward silence anymore. "Why are you here?" 

"Because I knew you'd be here." The other responded without hesitation. "And...I also want to apologize."

He scoffed. "Since when do you care?"

"Tommy, please. Just- just look at me." 

The blonde hesitated for a moment, before turning to face the other. He could see the sheer emotion of sadness in his eyes, and the crack in his voice. He almost felt bad. Almost.

"I know I exiled you, and I did it for a good reason. L'Manburg can't take another war at that time, since it was still healing. I didn't- I never wanted for things to turn out this way." Tubbo let out a sigh, letting his shoulders relax for a bit. "After you were exiled, things started to go downhill. I know I should've visited you sooner, and I'm sorry. I really am. I know words aren't probably enough, but I just wanted to let you know how I feel." 

Tommy stayed silent for a moment, trying to comprehend his feelings into words. "I...I get it now. You're the president, so you just fucking exile your best friend when he's a liability to your country."

"You're the vice president, and your actions have consequences. It was the only way-"

"Tubbo, when was peace ever an option? For months, all we ever do is fight in wars and shit! The moment we think everything is fine, it's not!" He stood up from his seat, glaring down at him. "Everyone seems to forget I don't want both of us to be in a position of power because it would drive us apart. Look how that turned out. It was supposed to be me and you, and all you fucking did was throw me away after I sacrificed everything for this- _this_ stupid nation!" 

"L'Manburg is our home, Tommy! We promised to protect it at whatever cost!" 

"IT STOPPED BEING MY HOME THE DAY YOU EXILED ME!"

Tubbo suddenly stayed silent upon the sudden outburst, allowing Tommy to continue. "L'Manburg stopped being what it used to be for me. We were all supposed to fight for it together, and now look at us! Wilbur's dead is a fucking ghost who can't remember the bad things. You're the president and you exiled me, your best friend. Big Q started his own fucking nation above L'Manburg. From what I heard, Fundy and Niki left and I don't know where the fuck Jack Manifold is."

Something wet slipped down his cheek, and he hated that he noticed it. "I'm- I'm trying. I'm trying so hard to pull everything together- I never even wanted to be the president! I just- I can't do this- I can't- Tommy, please-"

"I'm sorry, Tubbo. But you brought this upon yourself." He kept his head low, as he used an ender pearl to get away, leaving the broken and lonely president on the bench. He hated how tears are streaming down his face, and he hated how his heart ached. 

They both knew, that deep down, they both missed each other. It's just harder to admit it out loud with everything that has been happening lately, and with all the complicated emotions and strings that are pulling them apart. 

The world can be cruel. That itself, is a fact. 

But the beauty of something broken is that it can be repaired. It'll just time, as the two halves need to be healed. 

Maybe someday, they'll be able to laugh and play together, just like the old times. They'll be able to forget everything and put the past behind them, and live a peaceful life.

However, the puppeteer pulling the strings seems to have other plans for his two pawns in his game.

══════════════════

❝ _Love is all I need_

_It's where it all began_

_You will always find me in your heart_

_I know that you can see_

_Just who I really am_

_So always know_

_I'm never far away_

_Keep me close another day_

_But you will always find me in your heart_ ❞

**Author's Note:**

> i was really tired and its like,,,12 am when i wrote this so if you see typos you dont  
> sorry if the ending is rushed jhdjshsj


End file.
